You are the creator of your reality. If there is something you desire in your life, ask for it!
We have heard this statement hundreds of times, but most of us have no idea what that really means. So, I broke it down in five steps for you.
1. Know what you want and have a strong desire to get it.
Visualize your life as if your desire is completely yours. First spend some time getting clear on what you desire. Journal, meditate, exercise. The idea is that you focus clearly on what you want without the noise in your head. Another way to do this is to journal about your ideal life. Get specific about how you want your days to look.
2. Ask for it.
Once you are clear on what you want ask a power greater than yourself to assist you in creating what you want. Say it out loud. Say it to a friend. Post it in a group you are in. Get it out of you and into the universe.
3. Believe you can have what you ask for.
Believe you can have what you ask for. Have faith you will receive it and free yourself from doubt. Your belief must be as strong as your desire. You can live your dream life, you just have to believe it is possible.
4. Express gratitude.
Allow your heart and your mind to be filled with gratitude often. Start a practice of gratitude daily. It could be creating a gratitude jar or setting a reminder on your phone, or maybe each evening you can sit with your family and each share one thing you are grateful for.
Action is most often the missing piece to the manifestation puzzle. You must do the work to make this happen. Come up with a list each day to get you to your goal. If you want to start a successful business, focus on ways to market yourself and get clients. If you want to create a new relationship, find ways to be visible.
Marketing is not always the easiest of things to do and often times it helps to build a road-map for ourselves. Here is a list to help you with your road-map for the week.
Pick 7 or 8 of the marketing exercises or strategies below and commit to doing them this week!
~Read or write every day for 1 hour
~Interview 1 person a week
~Connect with 3 new people a day
~Go to 1 live networking event per week
~Have coffee with a colleague once per week
~Add 20 new social media connections each week
~Make 1 new online connection each week
~Post 20 comments on someone’s FB post a week
~Contact 3 people/groups a week about speaking
~Book a speaking event
~Spend an hour each week promoting you speaking event
~Blog 1x per week
~Find 1 new venue to post articles/blogs each week
~Pitch 1 yourself to one podcast a week to be interviewed
~Contact 2 new potential partners each week
~Interact with your online network 30 minutes per day
~Talk to one potential client each day
My favorite way to get clients is in Facebook. Granted there are many other ways, but Facebook seems to be all the rage right now, and for good reason.
Here’s the thing… often times people are scared about putting themselves out there in the world of FB and have no idea where to start. Below are five ways to get started now.
1. Make sure you identify your ideal client. If you haven’t done the Ideal client exercise in a while, your time is now! Spend 15 minutes writing about your ideal customer. Get as specific as possible. Name. Gender. Age. Occupation. Where does she live. What does she do for a living. Married? Kids? Single? What does she do on weekends? What does she do on a random Tuesday night with girlfriends? What blogs/magazines does she read? Who does she follow on FB/Instagram/Twitter? What boards does she follow on Pinterest? What does she believe in? What keeps her up at night? What are her fears? Get as detailed as possible.
2. Find the groups this person hangs out in. You can do a search in FB on the top of the page. Type in keywords that your ideal client uses and find groups with those people. This could take a bit of time, but it is worth it!
3. Join the groups and find 3 or 4 of the groups with the most interaction.
4. Consistently post in those groups (no more than 4). When you show up and post in the groups talk to you ideal client and your ideal client only! Let’s say your ideal client’s name is Lucy. Talk to Lucy as if you know everything about her. Talk to her struggles. Her fears. HELP her and provide value to her. And guess what…there are a ton of Lucy’s out in the world waiting to hear from you.
5. Once you find a few “Lucy’s” start building real relationships with them. Reach out and bring up an issue that you know she is facing or some type of connection you share.
As seen on Huntington Post.
I cannot believe we are approaching the holidays! When I realized Hanukkah is coming up in a few weeks I freaked out (in a good way). Just in case you are like me and have NO idea where to start, I put together a quick guide of some of my favorite gifts. Enjoy:
We all start our business for reasons that are specific to us. We are born entrepreneurs; we crave freedom; cannot spend our days in a florescent cubicle; we want more time with our kids, etc. But the successful businesses are the ones that are fully aligned with their core purpose. That core purpose is literally infused into every part of their business. Their website copy screams their purpose and mission. Their branding is completely on point with their WHY and their social media presence is oozing with their message.
The first thing I do as a business coach when on-boarding a new client is have them tell me why they started their business. Most of the time their story starts with wanting to make money. Then it fizzles and the client gets flustered and frustrated and they have a hard time describing their why. And it’s okay! We all struggle with this, but can you imagine what would happen to your business once you infuse your WHY into it? Can you imagine how the alignment would attract new clients?
1. Write down three reasons why you started your business. Start with a blank screen or piece of paper and think about the reasons you started your business. Go back to the beginning for this one. Write about the passion and drive that lead you to create your business. Keep writing until it hits you (and if you give into this exercise it will hit you).
2. Cultivate Confidence. Read over the testimonials you received. Sometimes we need an influx of courage when diving deep into our purpose and that courage comes from confidence. Also, write a list of your unique skills to help you pinpoint your talents.
3. Picture yourself on stage in front of an audience who has your undivided attention. What would you say?
4. Get inspired often. Creativity fuels innovation and businesses thrive on it. Watch TEDTalks, listen to podcasts, interview people you look up to, etc.
5. Create the space to integrate your WHY. This piece is the key piece to the puzzle. Dedicate the time to explore your WHY and integrate it into your life and business.
Connecting with your WHY and purpose is a choice. It takes courage and power to integrate your WHY into everything you do. You need to want it. And if you do and you are ready you will see a massive shift in your business. Trust me.
The journey of becoming an entrepreneur can be a long and lonely one. It is not always easy but I believe it is our responsibility to do the things that inspire us. And the entrepreneur journey begins with the fire of inspiration. We have all had it. That burning desire to create something. That longing to express something that is begging to come out of us. That craving for building something new.
But what happens when it doesn’t come? What do we do when we search and search for inspiration and it doesn’t show up for us? What do we do? As entrepreneurs inspiration is crucial to our survival.
I believe that in order to find inspiration, we must connect to our why. Simon Sinek writes “Leaders who are successful are the ones who keep true to the core of their why.” At some level people are not always interested in what you do, they buy the why you do what you do. People are more attuned to buy into the why of your business. They don’t always care about how you do it or what it is. They always care about the why behind it.
So how do we connect with our why? Here are a few ideas:
1. Write down three reasons why you started your business.
2. Read over the testimonials you received.
3. What do people typically ask you for help in?
4. What do you love teaching about?
5. If you were speaking to a large captivated audience filled with your ideal clients, what would you talk about?
Once we can figure out our why we can then move on to building, creating and tweaking the platform to make it happen.
You are not here to just go to work, pay bills, change diapers and die. (Yes, super dramatic sorry) We all have dreams. Most of us have BIG dreams! If you felt connected and empowered would you have the courage to make your dreams a reality?
I believe that the best way to achieve a life full of passion and desire is by stepping up and showing up for yourself. Creating the life you want is possible and you have the power to make it happen.
I believe this with my entire being, but I haven’t always lived like this. I stayed in the shadows for way too long. I thought the house with the white picket fence and 2.5 kids was the thing that would make me happy. And honestly it did. Until it didn’t. Until the longing for more kept creeping in. It took having a late term pregnancy loss which shook up everything I believed in for me to realize that my dreams mattered. And so do yours.
Let’s face it, we all struggle with empowerment at some point in our lives. We all have things we would like to run away from and sometimes the thought of confronting our fears scare us more than the fear itself. We as high achieving women have to remember that the idea of standing up for ourselves and our beliefs don’t make us bitches or rough around the edges. It makes us powerful. It makes us truthful and unafraid. And that power can be a bit uncomfortable.
Here are five ways to step into that power with ease:
• Get Clear On Your Desires. Jot down a few activities that make you feel most taken care of and fully alive. Put the list on a post it on your computer so you see it every day. Get clear on the things that make you feel powerful
• Let go of the Guilt. It’s totally normal to feel like you “shouldn’t” be taking time for reflection. There are so many things to be done during the day and sometimes the last thing you want to do is spend time on you. But if you don’t who will? Spend a few minutes writing down the feelings of guilt and burn it. Or rip it apart. The idea is that you release them.
• Tap into your Courage. My experience with courage was a long one. Once I realized that my feelings were not an actual threat to me I was able to sit with it. I held it. I explored it. I was curious about it. I realized if I sat in the darkness with compassion the light started to shine in…slowly. I realized my pain was just energy. And that energy subsides if you give it love.
Try to sit and explore what is holding you back and have faith that the fears will subside. Write down what comes up for you.
• Meditate. We hear it all the time: meditation is the key to happiness, health, creativity, stress management and so on. And it is true. Take 5 minutes each day to sit comfortably in a quiet place and just breath and release. We all have the answers within us and sometimes all we need is to remove some of the noise so we can hear our own voice.
• Create a mantra or daily affirmation. Through the power of mantra we can shift the way we feel and show up in the world. Each morning come up with a mantra or affirmation that will help guide you into love and acceptance. Ex: “I have the courage to step into my future gracefully with ease.” or “Even though I am not ready to move on from ____, I forgive and love myself.” Write it down and post it where you can see it throughout the day.
Our fears don’t have to define us. They can be part of us and our journey. We can step out of our shadows and into our power with love, grace and a bit of work.
Up until a few years ago I ran from my feelings. I ran fast. I felt like I wasn’t strong enough to handle the challenges in my life. I’d sit in my therapists office with my mantra…”It’s just too much” over and over again. This was the way I coped. But I had to change and I knew it. I had to be a mom, a business owner, a wife, a friend. I had to heal but the idea of facing myself was way too overwhelming.
But over time I learned how to handle it. I learned I was strong enough. Once I realized that my feelings were not an actual threat to me I was able to sit with it. I held it. I explored it. I was curious about it. I realized if I sat in the darkness with compassion the light started to shine in…slowly. I realized my pain was just energy. And that energy subsides if you give it love.
And throughout this process I learned so much about myself. Without sitting and exploring my feelings I would never have really known myself. I would never have known my strengths. I would be a shell of who I am. Again, nothing about this process is fun or glamorous but it is courageous. And we owe it to ourselves to be courageous.
So yesterday when some major stuff came up for me during a session I froze. Completely froze. The years of shutting down reared its ugly face. But this time I was a witness. I sat with it. I checked in with what was going on for me. It was not pretty. In fact it was pretty ugly. But after a few minutes it changed. It was no longer a daunting and debilitating. And I realized my capacity to deal with the hard stuff is there. I smiled.
I want this for you if you struggle with facing your fears and the ugly emotions that sometimes creep in to our world. I want to teach about my journey.
I want us all to stand up and face our fears (whatever they might be) in the face with a shitload of courage. I want you to feel held. To feel heard. Can you imagine what kind of impact we will have on the world once we stand in our power with grace and courage?
I am building a program around this, but if you want to dive in now please reach out!
I am going to come out and say that if my husband had it his way, we would be having sex at least five times a week. But that is just crazy if you ask me. We have two small kids and have hectic crazy lives. By the time the kids are asleep often times the last thing I want to do is have sex.
So how do we meet in the middle? Here are a few ideas to help your marriage out.
1. Take care of you
I get it, taking care of you does not seem like it will lead to more sex or even more drive. But as we get older and push out a few kids our bodies change drastically. Exercising, eating nourishing, nutritious foods, getting enough sleep (LOL) helps us feel good about ourselves. And feeling good and confident in our bodies leads to more energy and energy often leads to sex.
2. Think outside the “sex in the bedroom” box
Try locking yourselves in the bathroom for a quicky in the morning while the kids destroy their rooms trying to get dressed. Sneak away at a party and have sex in your car. Get down in the kitchen after the kids are asleep. Get creative and see what happens.
3. Plan playful date nights
Each month, try alternating the planning of date nights. Try to be as playful as possible when it’s your turn to plan. Try live music, bowling, rock climbing… have fun!
4. Listen and pay attention to your desires
We all have desires. Some are more hidden than others. Getting clear on your desires and needs can lead to more intimacy with your partner. When you have some alone time, take a few moments and ask yourself what you want in the bedroom. It is something most women are too embarrassed to do, but give it a shot. You might be pleasantly surprised.
5. Be okay with saying no
We as women can feel SO guilty when we turn our partners down. Do your best to get over it, but pay attention to patterns. If you find yourself saying no more often than saying yes, it might be time to do some reflecting.
As seen on HuffPost.